My year started with my birthday (1st January) I was excited as usual and full of expectations for this new chapter in my life. 400L first semester exams were around the corner, and with my rapidly dropping CGPA I knew that I had a lot of reading & trusting to do. I ensured I enjoyed the little time I had to spend at home thoroughly. I tried flipping through a few notes but the activities at home stole my full focus. Resumption day came faster than I thought, a few classes & before I knew it, exam was next week. I flew into full panic mood. People were posting past questions on group chat, printing past questions, photocopying notes, spreading rumor of how lecturers have threatened to make our CGPA’s drop rapidly, I constantly had sweat beads on my upper lip & nose; my eyes constantly dilated from fear. There just seemed to be roadblocks every time I tried to read. From the enticing activities at home that were too hard to resist, to the extremely fun room mates I had, to the church activities here and there, to sleeping excessively from all the stress I pass through in the day. To say the least, I was certain this would be my worst semester ever. I knew it was over!My dream of a 1st class in Economics B.Sc was slowly fading right before my eyes. My Soul wept!
I knew people expected so much from me this semester, after all I had been soaring academically since 100L and it was just natural for people to expect nothing less than excellence from me. I already had my days and nights booked with tutorial appointments for my mates and juniors. I felt so alone. It seem like I was drowning. I had tried eluding tutorials because I didn’t know what to teach them since I was also blank and was quiet certain that most of them knew more on the subject matter than I did, only that they didn’t know that.
While I was thinking about how I would fail woefully, a thought suddenly forced itself out of my clouded thoughts. Suddenly I remembered my Father, the one who owns the heavens & the earth, the one in whom I live, move and have my being. I smiled gratefully with tears in my eyes & I launched into soft worship songs & prayers.
I knew everything would be fine & so I just cast my burdens in the Lord for he cares for me. My surest companion (The Holy Spirit) gave me great insight in how to read and manage my time. I started reading in the night, reaching people in the day, I understood better tutoring topics I’d both read before and those I never read. My Chapel meeting were very time consuming as I was the welfare Exco in prayer band, an executive in Sisters’ fellowship, I was in treasury unit, welfare unit always had outings or long meetings every Sunday & lastly, I was the Financial Secretary of my great department. With the help of the Holy Spirit I was able to keep sane, read to a very good extent, perform well in my units & keep my social life reasonably active. I thank God for good friends that kept me happy & stood by me through my lowest points and high test points. The exams soon came to an end, I was pretty certain that I’d done well all round, & that 1st semester 400L won’t be my worst after all, little did I know Baba God probably chuckled at my confident assumption.
Second semester 400L soon came around. We were all happy to be back, some people had almost completed their final year projects, some were just starting, while others like me were still gathering the needed information for the successful completion of our projects.
Everyone was looking forward to the end of semester activities. Final year students were all about project. There was tension everywhere. People were crying & breaking down due to the roadblocks they were encountering with their supervisors. I met my supervisor, I felt quite unfortunate being in his team because of my previous encounters with him. Surprisingly though, he was very helpful. We concluded on a project topic easily & thankfully, there was enough data & references online to make it easy, just that it was a very broad topic. I started my project feeling on top of the world. Test soon came, marathon classes, and before I knew it, I was still in chapter 1 of my project. Few people were in Chapter 3,4 and some had even finished their projects, but here I was, stuck in chapter one. My supervisor corrected it twice and soon all our pockets were burning because project costs a lot of money. In the midst of all the project turmoil, preparation in my various Chapel units for our end of semester dinner, preparation for NESA dinner as financial secretary, lectures, tests & other activities. Our 1st semester result was released.
I nearly died from panick. My phone was not browsing due to the poor connection of my network in that area, so I sprinted down to Adenike’s room, I went to the stairs for good network connection & as the page slowly loaded I could feel not just beads of sweat on my body, but sweat balls slowly made their way down the sides of my face & my back. My heart was thumping loudly in my ears. It seemed like an eternity. Finally it opened, my eyes quickly located the bottom of the page & I saw my CGPA my heart skipped a beat, I froze, my world came crashing, I had dropped from a 4.71 to a 4.61. I tried hard not to cry but when Adenike asked me about it, I broke down & wept profusely. Where had I gone wrong? I had been so sure!!! Oh! Why Lord? I questioned on and on. I soon accepted my fate and sure enough the so called rumor had come to pass, as most people had huge declines in their CGPA. I was still grateful that I was still on a 1st class and that night I worshipped God for an excellent result, and for being my ever faithful God.
Things soon calmed down & everyone stared rushing hard. I was putting in so much effort. I also had way too many activities in my various units and sourcing funds for my Dept dinner & sponsorship was the height of stress as we had to go out to organizations, write letters, go to banks, have meetings. I knew I’d break down. The stress was more than I’d anticipated. I had to decline some outings and activities just so I could meet up with the primary reason for being in school. My project was so stressful as my data had some issues, there was hardly any network to browse with, so many directions to make, hardly any money to flex with.
Prayer band, Welfare, Treasury & NESA dinner parties all went well with me getting gifts from Prayer Unit as the Welfare Director & NESA as the Financial Secretary & Most Sought After student. Welfare & Treasury unit also gave gifts to all final year students. When all the activities died down, we were left with the reality of exams the following week. No one was ready. I was 0% ready and I ran to my Father, I prayed fervently, and yes, the exam date was moved by two weeks. I was glad. There was more than enough time to read. I was almost done with my project, so I suspended it to focus on my exams. Reading went smoothly and all the papers were wonderfully excellent! I fell ill after the exams but I did not go to the clinic because I knew they’d admit me and that simply meant I would not complete my project, with the help of friends, I finished my project and my malaria was at its peak by then. My Final Year Project Defense went well just that I was weak & pale. I went to the hospital immediately after were I got worse till I had to go back & I was treated for malaria which solved the whole issue. My parents came, picked me up & I puked the whole journey home from Osun to Lagos. This was one of my lowest moments, taking second place to my 1st semester result.
Results were finally released. I didn’t even know till Adenike calmed me to inform me. The first thing she said was “Ore, we made it!!!!” I told her I didn’t understand, then she informed me that she’d checked my result and I was graduating with a 1st class in Economics B.Sc.
The amount of gratitude that filled my soul knew no bounds, and I was at my highest point when I felt God wrap me in his arms with so much warmth & love. In my spirit resounded these words “I’ll never leave you nor forsake you!” and in response I said “Ever faithful God!! My God is not a sly!!” as I danced triumphantly round the house.
I’m sure you’re wondering what my CGPA was, well, to your sure disappointment, I dropped to a 4.59 out of 5.00 CGPA, making me the 3rd best graduating student in Economics B.Sc Dept for my set. Yay!! I know right!!! I can confidently say, seeing this result, though it’s the lowest my CGPA ever dropped, I was the happiest I’ve ever been. I was even happier than when I had 5.00. God taught me gratitude, trust, faith, hope and so much more.
I got handshakes on stage during my graduation ceremony from all the dignitaries for my wonderful fit. I felt on top of the world.
I also got monetary awards from family and friends.
My church also awarded me with a medal, plaque & monetary awards for my first class honors result.
To say the truth, God is faithful, lean not on your own understanding, and he will direct your path. He is not a sly.
One of my lowest moments was also when a very good guy friend of mine developed feelings for me.
I felt no form of erotic love for him but when people started calling us Mr & Mrs, I knew something was wrong.
We used to spend so much time together everyday.
In my mind we were just friends, but in his, we were heading towards marriage.
So I asked him, he denied it initially but later opened up. I turned him down, he kept on persisting, so I went to great extent to prevent it. He started trying to imply God was the one telling him to marry me, and this caused a huge fight. We stopped talking as much as we used to. Some people told me I’m wicked for leading him on and then leaving him, but I had no idea. All in all it put a strain on the relationship. We’re on good terms though. He eventually apologized and now, he has a girlfriend!!
So I learned from this that we should always define our relationship. Never lead anyone on knowingly or unknowingly. Ask questions. Don’t let guilt or pity make you date or marry someone. Be real to yourself.
Ask God for help and guidance before doing anything.
I’ve learnt so much this year and during this my NYSC period, I plan on learning much more in the school I’ll be teaching at or the office I’ll be working with.
I signed up with SDGs, so I’ll impact the community I find myself in positively.
I plan to continually achieve excellence in all I do, God helping me.
Season’s Greetings from Perry’s Tots.
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